10 Attractive Personality Traits Men Want: [Physical vs Inner Beauty]

What are attractive personality traits men seeking long-term relationships want?

Attractive Personality Traits Men

What men want MORE hot women? Really? Attractive personality traits men like mean more than looks to us.

Newsflash: Men want more than attractive looks.

And let the on-going debate of physical vs inner beauty continue.

Yes, ALL men place high priority on outer beauty, but men need certain personality traits to feel happy in their relationships.

If we referenced the age old expression men like to use a lot “You can win the battle, but lost the war” (the bigger issue matters more than the smaller issue), then a man’s long-term relationship needs trump what he would like on one single date (or brief dating run with a girl).

Physical beauty= the battle; Inner beauty=the war

So what do men seeking long-term relationships want in a girlfriend?

This Is What Men Want from Women BUT Are Too Stupid to Admit

So men want more than physical beauty?


The kind of men that seek relationships do.

I don’t think many of us know it (or at least admit it among each other).

In the war of physical vs inner beauty men appear to care much more about outer beauty, even during conversations between guys but…

Ask yourself this:

Ever wonder why men chase the chubby, outgoing girl?

Since many women think men like women with extra padding, why do overweight women win the men?

And how does the not-that-pretty girl get the men too?


Men chase women who understand them and appreciate them for who they are.

Of course men start with looks when seeking a mate and yes, men love to rate looks like it’s the Olympics on a scale of 1-10 BUT

…You Are Hot and Didn’t Know It and Here’s Why…

Remember 2 very important things: “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” and how you treat a man and make a man feel affects how beautiful he finds you.

One of my exes used to recite that phrase to me. She’d say that she wasn’t pretty, that she was only beautiful in my eyes.

Take it from a relationship expert.

According to online female dating coach Evan Marc Katz, men want to go out with women on a second date for 2 reasons 1) that HE FINDS YOU attractive (he decides if you are pretty, it doesn’t matter if you judge yourself too harshly), 2) he feels you are easygoing and fun

You may not think of yourself as physically attractive, but he does. And when you are fun to hang out with and he feels comfortable being his natural self then he will want to see you more often.


Now onto the list of the attractive personality traits men look for in women for relationships.

Don’t expect the ordinary, boring traits you see on other lists like sense of humor, she smiles all the time and thinks positively. No, duh, those are a given.

Yes, we men do want those qualities, but we’ll dig deeper.

You also will not find what men don’t want on this list either like “she doesn’t play mind games”.


Only the personality characteristics us men DO want with women whom we want a deep relationship.

The list won’t disappoint.

12 Attractive Personality Traits Men DO Want in Long-Term Relationships…[in addition to sex and physical beauty]

What do men crave most from a girlfriend? Let’s rate each trait using a 1-10 scale:

1Completely Unimportant to 10A Real Keeper. Girlfriend Material

1. Gives Us Time to Ourselves [9]

Whether to watch the ballgame with friends or time to decompress. Men need alone time.  Please tell us how your day at work went, but learn when we need to escape.

2. Learn and Appreciate SOME of Our Passions and Hobbies [6-7]

Not all of them, but learn about our favorite team and root for them (unless they play yours), watch our favorite action movies with us, take a genuine interest in our favorite foods and beverages.

3. Real Men Want to Feel Like Heroes (AKA: They Want to Feel Needed) [9]

Not referring to donning a cape and swooping in through the window to save you from a burning building, instead to solve some problems that you don’t know how to. Maybe your man’s a techie, perhaps he loves to cook or knows a thing or two about writing resumes. Whatever his talent or skills let him help you.

4. Femininity/Charming in Ladylike Way [7]

Attractive personality traits men want in women often have to do with her mannerisms and the way she presents herself. We like decisive, strong women, but ladylike. When you hear a man say he likes women in heels and with red lipstick most really mean they want someone distinctly feminine.

5. Flexible/Open-Minded to Our Ideas Too [9]

Whether woman or man, if you need to be right for the sake of being right then the relationship will rock like a boat. You have your way of seeing and doing things and we have ours. Both must share their opinions and listen intently to the other for the relationship to work. You want to be hear, so do we.

6. Supportive of Our Careers, Interests, Friends [8-9]

It appears I’m not the only one who says this. Don’t tell a man how to be a man. We have our lives to live and we want to choose what field to work in. Don’t understand why we want to DJ on the side or play basketball with the guys past 30 then sorry, deal with it. Believe me, men don’t care what you career you choose nor what you do with your friends. Give us some slack too.

7. Sympathetic and Empathetic [10]

Will you beat us when we’re down or understand and support us? Too many women play the tough love card. We don’t need that. And neither do you when things don’t go your way.

8. Effective Conflict Resolution Skills [10]

We won’t always agree, in fact, we’ll flat out bump heads at times. In the end we both need to work it out. There’s no room for stubbornness or blame.

9. Calm and Reserved Under Pressure [8]

When life gets in the way and all seems to go to hell for us (job, finances, kids, etc) will you keep your cool? We want a woman who handles problems on a case-by-case basis- not jump to conclusions and assume everything else will fall apart now and drive us insane.

10. Compliments Our Physical Aspects [7-8]

We know we don’t have perfect bodies or looks, but please make use feel good about who we are just like you expect from us. Tell us how cute we look today, how you like our hair a certain way or which color of shirt looks best on us. Please make us feel like you’re paying attention to our looks too.

11. Laughs at Our Sense of Humor [8]

We don’t expect you to ask us to enter the next stand up comedy open mic contest, but laugh at our attempts at humor. Pretend to at least. When you don’t laugh or smile around us we feel like we fail you. We want to feel like we make you happy and enjoy our company.

12. Likes Us for Who We Are [10]

You have many choices of guys to choose from, but you chose us despite our quirkiness and stupid remarks. Life beats us up enough, we don’t want you to join in. When you make us feel like the only guy in the world in your life and who we are is good enough then we feel like the luckiest person in the world.

You can’t trade these attractive personality traits men want for anything.

The feelings we get when you make us feel special are worth gold.

You look beautiful to us darling just the way you are.

And if you don’t believe men seeking long-term relationships only value looks then check this out.

What’s the Glue that Bonds Long-Term Partners: What Makes Men and Women Want to Stick Together?

When two people love each other certain key factors must exist.

What are they?

This study by psychologist Aaron Aron shares his findings in this article: The 12 Ties that Bind Long-Term Relationships. Interesting read.

Summary of the Attractive Personality Traits Men Seeking Long-Term Relationships Want

Many men focus on outer beauty, but in the war of physical vs inner beauty what makes men happy is unconditional love and support.

Life will get messy, we will not agree, but for us to maintain a happy, long-term relationship only traits like the one on this list count.

Make no mistake. Men want a soulmate.

If you want to experience romance and love again in your life, but you still think about your ex then check out my Evan Marc Katz “Why He Disappeared review”.

Or if you fear falling in love again or you doubt you will find the right guy for you then find some answers in Believe in Love by Evan Marc Katz. Read my sneak peek review of Believe in Love before you download your own copy.

1 Comment
  1. Reply
    Margaret November 6, 2016 at 01:30

    I’m not so sure men value personality.

How do you feel about this topic?

Infidelity First Aid Kit
%d bloggers like this: